oh becky,

i crave erasure or more
self-direction and i think
of you

I think pizza

is my favorite food. Not lame pizza, like Totinos or even Red Baron; but really good pizza, with veggies and red sauce and a tasty crust. Those crusts they sell at the farmer's market are pretty delicious (kudos to Le Quartier). I can make a pretty tasty pizza with those crusts. I also give kudos to Suite One - although they delivered our pizza to the wrong table, this enabled us to be given a free and delicious deep-dish pizza. Yia Yia's is also a classic, with their beers from around the world and a wide variety of topping selections. Feta is delicious on pizza.

My two favorite pizza destinations in Omaha are La Casa and Don Carmelos. While differing crustally, both share a quality of ingredients that make my tummy happy.

I am a dork. Farewell and eat pizzas. Yes, multiple.

oh, falling

you're better

*cough*

There was this bar where wal-mart is (actually inside) and I was blending things, blending watermelon margaritas and salting the tops. - I can see where all the aspects come from the day and everything I learn just makes the others seem less real. I can't become a spectator. I'm steeped in emotion and even by realizing the relative randomness of life
I can't separate. - anyway I had taken my shirt off, but found it and my purse had not been stolen and this child was shopping for cheese with his mother and staring at me. I put my shirt on, smiled drunkenly, walked home in my heels.






hush hush
I really love you
I don't even know
how to say that correctly
(I hope you can make sense of me).
I over complicate because I'm unsure
of what I'm saying (of what you get
from what I'm saying).
All nervousness aside: YOU
delight me in multiple ways.

blog humbug.

i want i want i want i just want
money honey
i want want
want
want want
want

want
wax wane moon crescent
scrumtrul
-escent. fluorescent won
me the pennant
or the spelling bee the
spewing fly the when
will you accept this embroidery
i've threaded to spell
out my compliments?

oh grandma,
why did you teach me
uselessness? i broke that spaghetti
in cold water pans with some spice
and never felt like a great
pretender.

Every day

My nails, they're
sort of long
-ish.

Let's see
if they last through
the day. I have

strange desires,
consequent
-ly dreams
disturb my sleep
and wake.

Every
time I turn,
see you, some
sensation

of new
that you've burrowed
in me. I'm

hedgehog-floating

on my back and it's
burning it burns
and I bleed.

Justin showed me this

I just pulled a bug from my neck

Hello

nice to make your
assertion. Mix yeast

water, flour
with the sweet

electricity, machine
parts. Machinate
the dough until

it turns upon
itself - folding
and falling.

Series-osity

The weight of walls
falling and wheels
spun in mud flipping
upwards, convince.

Convince and can’t keep
separation of parts
from objects.

At a certain rate, gravity
makes a mass to fall. To
somewhere but here-now,
that fall corrects

the relative wrong of ground
-object separation.

I want a hedgehog

I drink it up

I can't eat this can't
breathe back come
back or keep.

I can't I can't I can't

I could but I can't

It's not about

being woman or man or something else. Why the fuck
would you vote for McCain
because your woman didn't win
the nomination? I don't get it. I'm not looking
close enough. I don't get it. I just don't understand
often
how people can say the things they say
and I get caught up in it
and I fucking miss you
and I'm trying not to think trying trying to be interesting/interested/friendly and helpful to customers/worthy of tips/on time/befriended/be friends. Your voice breaks. Stop jeering. Stop booing. Everyone stop talking. I'm ranting this
isn't making sense altogether I can't
I can't manage these long days this thinking
not thinking hard enough well enough

I am not happy without you.

identification of mislabeled emotion, or disabling condition

you are scaring me, you
scare me off, you scare
me. you are scaring
me, you scare me, you are
scary things and scaring
me, you scare me there; i scare

myself or scar or can't
complete the action of
the thought.

she's on the news now
her hair screams but
more strings and
i pluck it out i pluck it
like a banjo string

you sweep your hair
off to the side, he does,
but her voice is so serious
so obviously trying to be both

the office and the officiator.

watched

cnn last night after getting back, saw "remembering tim russert;" but he was talking to larry king so he couldn't be dead. fuel charges affecting schools: they buy fewer library books and i ride to my workings. kyle, you were in my dream last night. i was going to make you a coffee "i don't like coffee"
"yeah, i know"
"make me a mocha"
which is ridiculous because you don't like chocolate either, right?
my hand itches.

D:

i don't like it when you're gone. i mean, i deal with it, sure, and i'm fine...but i am not a happy camper.
plus i've shorn my hair and it's a weird reality being without the both of you.

oh the glory, oh the beautiful beautiful glory

god damnit.

I washed my dry clean only pants and now
they hang oddly with the liner longer than the pant part.
And my Eric is gyros away. This -
this is ridiculousnosity. I am missing him when I think too much about it.
But I'm heading to OOMaha, and I watched Dead Man
with Justin and Carlin last night - Criiiiispin!! -

Sincerely,
RacheliseWulfgang

some women

can pull off "shaved head"
others...
not so much

i wonder which category i would fall into...

I like biting

the skin on my fingers
but i don't like that i do it.

it's addiction. like sucking
a thumb. or drugs or sex

or salt.


it is what it is what it is what it is what it
is it?

I am tired

fucking tired too tired to come up with anything important to say = nothing important and said is come up with
just is and is then on a page/in the air
not sure
speech was and could be considered superior to writing. because you say what you mean
at the time
unless you're afraid like you are
or something unless you don't know
it's the thinking that ruins you

i cried when you left a little
it was early
and i've loved you more than 300 days.

I may be high

on caffeine right now but it's better * I love

Rae Armantrout * her book
the physics of it all*

I love her Rae Armantrout
I love her Rae Armantrout

I'm sort of bored, been thrown off to the office with Steve/without everyone else. What is that called? Banishment?

Eric, I'm sorry. I don't have the money to buy replacement razor blades right now;
although I do have two disposables left.

happy june btw
my phone keeps buzzing and it keeps making me think
someone's calling me

daily show is crazy tonight
...i'm thinking about that last statement...

Listening

to music is something I haven't done for awhile. Finally today I had a little time that felt good. In that I wasn't busy in that I got home sweaty and tired in that I felt like I had figured out a bit of my life (of my finances). Now it's slipping. I slip a lot and I trip and I don't like to move around you. I've realized a lot of what I do is highly shaped by fear (of harm/hurt/embarrassment: imperfection)
I either avoid doing anything to incur these, or completely disregard the possibility *mistaking a disregard for an actual lack of concern* No
still
there still
happens. I'll really be okay though. It's just difficult ever since I fucked up so badly

metal has appeal in theory only
upon serious contemplation - sour

For instance right now - I'm liking the idea of biking
but not of the destination. People. My brain's not working
I am not my mother
or I am my mother's daughter
which I've never been sure about (the meaning)

Oh John McCain, raise the roof with your arthritic arms.
I dislike you for non-cosmetic reasons or sometimes I question to value of disliking anyone/thing because I sort of get it all - or get that it all could be me and you...and then the thought: does this fact mean what I think it means or just that one may/should/could/will give up on people they think are on their side if one shifts, if one shifts?:? I do not give up not really. Do you? What do you do to keep yourself contained and still touch me?

Rust on the counter. Corroded bike cables
replaced. Oh my god why can't you
lick my lips for me?