Whaddaya know!

I'm an introvert!

It storms. This morning was a rainbow and a bug up my nose. Oh fug.
And a too short dress a bit bit
and then Mary Kay "free facial"s
not so facial, i mean, not so much
i didn't buy anything or get anything
much out of it

And then grits

And teeth.

new laptop. New conversation with my mother
who called me with my brother's phone to make me answer

better
better
better

i wish someone knew and could tell me
all the answers to any questions__like why this sudden socket

or sodden. from where.
there hasn't been a lot of typing__what so
without the caboose and without Maude to make it

so so. Sew you. Sew pieces
with threading
with needling

sew lovely little birdy's bones
sew
chew.















we'll chew the lads into completion
and out of this mass. we'll roil within
and boil our skin until ready and sold

so for vending.







what was sylvia plath thinking
you could ask. you could ask all the questions
be answered. all there is

pieces of days combed into a life
this is happening__now
we are happening.

in the bedroom__behind walls
that small

space of mold on the ceiling turned floor.
the blackening and the swamp
there. where it's happening.

your wet life. your wetting. your beautiful skin cells
are shedding.

Oh wow

it's been a bit since I authored that last little whatnot.
But whatever. I'm living the real life.



Your apricots are skin
-crawling. Stop motion

animation. I mean the folds.
And folding. I mean the nudity.

Never
on the couch. Never finish

on the floor.
Where we've walked and walked. You know mothers.

Teaching their children. In the supermarket.
You see them putting the objects back
in all the wrong pockets. And checking. And checking out.

sometimes i think myself a self-hating woman
you know. like a self-hating mexican. my grandmother is a self-hating woman.
ugh. don't read this, myfamily. i just remember talking about it with my mom when i was a kid. and this is always the point in the thoughts where i recount my dad saying
we could ne-ver have a woman president, are you kidding~~ with the monthlies?! you can't leave them next to the nuclear button. you know, that button that you press and the whole world gets nuked

can you
just give me all of the music

i've been biking a lot lately
and watching historical fiction or
action films or
fantasy

i listen to the harry potter books online on youtube
in reverse
and i swear i'd thought i'd read that sirius died but he's alive and it's not because of the backwards
at least not this backwards
=
i don't know where i'm going with the race relations

that is why we are friends
and that is why it is hard for us to be friends
*******

watched "bram stoker's dracula" (92) with gary oldman, winona ryder, keanu, and antony hopkins
i no longer care if i'm spelling correctly is a lie for which i'll later pay penance.
oh, also, the man from the princess bride and the first saw movie.

so it was very obvious in its iterations and its green fog, and yes one adaptation among soooo many, but it was nice (after all the true blooding and twilighting etc) to see some version where the vamp must still be vanquished. is humanized but monster, truly. which was lost in the translation to tv of true blood particularly. love is a feeling it can get you past blood and monstrosity but love cannot overcome death.

oh the long, luxurious hair of dracul --!

I was off

had dreams we had to move to portland before we could move to kansas city. kristin says if she got preg she'd deal with it meaning, she'd carry. give birth and support resulting baby. i'd "take care of it."
what would you do?
what would you do?
get up on my feet and stop making